Tag Archives: Movies

The Fault In Our Tacos

I made a list 4 months ago and I decided to flesh this out.

The Fault In Our Tacos
Two competing taco trucks form a bond that can’t be broken.

The Fault In Our Prom Dates
Two strangers bond while their prom dates throw up in the bathroom.

The Fault In Our Parents
Two kids bond in the waiting room while their parents are in couples therapy.

The Fault In Our Employability
Two unemployed 20-somethings fall in love after constantly seeing each other at job fairs and interviews.

The Fault In Our Netflix Queue
Two strangers meet in a Panera and fall in love by criticizing the other’s Netflix queue.

The Fault In Our Texts
2 hours of phone screen shots, electronic beeps, and glowy faces.

The Fault In Our Friends
Two people fall in love while constantly bitching about their non-mutual friends.

The Fault In Our Just Friends
2 hours of two people in love (and in denial) constantly telling mutual friends that they are, in fact, “just friends”.

The Fault In Our Friendzones
Can love overcome a triangle of zones and barriers and the debate on whether or not such zones and barriers exist? No.

The Fault In Our Making Out
1 and a half hours of making out and 30 minutes of guilt/shame/disgust/regret. There’s also 4 sequels.

The Fault In Our Orthodontia
Two teens fall in love while waiting to get their braces and bands adjusted over the course of 6 months. Naturally they sabotage their own braces to extend the courting.

The Fault In Our Ground Fault
The classic guy-meets-girl-who-is-an-electrician-story.

The Fault In Our Pole Vault
All Canadians want to be pole vaulters.

The Fault In Our Defaults
Two hours of 2 people not meeting because they never change or deviate from their schedule enough to cross paths.

The Fault In Our FEELS
Two hours of ANGST and talking about ANGST and talking about our talking about of feelings of ANGST.

The Fault In Our Last Words
Two hours of someone trying to figure out the last words they want to say to their lying, cheating, former-significant other.

The Fault In Our SARS
The love story between two World Health Organization doctors as they themselves start dying.

The Fault In Our Plan
The classic story of boy meets girl and boy spends way too much time planning his next move. Girl dates someone she meets over the summer.

The Fault In Our Intentions
Two hours of hilariously unintentional misunderstandings. Like ‘Three’s Company’, only with teenage angst.

The Fault In Our Forever
Two hours of teenagers talking about forever while having the attention span of 3 seconds.

The Fault In Our Meme
Because high school.

The Fault In Our Chemistry
Two chemists meet and fall in love because of something to do with whiteboards and hexagon drawings. It’s science.

The Fault In Our Because 
Two teenagers fall in love even though they only answer questions by saying ‘because’.

The Fault In Our Privilege
The tragic story of a rich white suburban kid not being able to take the Mercedes to prom and his girlfriend not being able to afford that 2,500 dollar dress.

The Fault In Our Narcissism
Two hours of wardrobe changes and carefully sculpted Instagram pictures.

The Fault In Our Hotness
Two people who are literally too sexy for each other.

The Fault In Our Adorableness
Two people are so ridiculously adorable they cause everyone to spontaneously vomit. This ruins prom.

The Fault In Our Awkwardness
Two people so awkward that they can only possibly ever belong together because everyone else avoids them.

The Fault In Our Formulary
Pharmacy love!

The Fault In Our Strategery
Love In The Time Of Bush

The Fault In Our Seatbelts
Something about a teenager and a car crash. And survivor guilt.

The Fault In Our Phones
Missing the most important text of your life because your text inbox is full of all the other most important texts of your life.

The Fault In Our Window
Timing is hard!

The Fault In Our Side Hugs
Two people in love but only give side-hugs. The climax of the movie is actually a regular hug.

The Fault In Our Clinique Happy
The fragrance follows a young man around for years until he admits that he actually likes it.

The Fault In Our Star Trek
Two lovers have a split over whether or not JJ’s Star Trek is actually Star Trek or not.

The Fault In Our Star Wars
Two lovers have a split over whether or not they should even acknowledge Episode 1-3.

The Fault In Our Starbucks
Two people keep missing each other because they keep going to the wrong Starbucks.

The Fault In Our Pilot Season
Two struggling actors meet and fall in love during the time their pilots are shot, picked up, and then cancelled after the first 3 weeks.

The Fault In Our Standup
A first date at comedy club goes terribly wrong when one person laughs at all the wrong jokes.

The Fault In Our Wingman
2 hours of bros.

The Fault In Our DTR
Fork in the brain. Fork in the brain. Fork in the brain.

The Fault In Our Hygiene
Two people with terrible hygiene fall in love…until one of them showers and throws the relationship off balance!

The Fault In Our Straws
A college kid leaves a straw at a door and causes a girl to cry.

The Fault In Our Cusack
High Fidelity or Say Anything? The Sure Thing or Grosse Point Black? SO HARD TO PICK.

The Fault In Our No-Fault Accidents
Two insurance adjusters fall in love while sticking it to their clients.

The Fault In Our Parking Enforcement
Two parking enforcement officers fall in love for the same rebellious scofflaw.

The Fault In Our Away Messages
The last two people on Earth using AIM decide to just call each other on the phone.

The Fault In Our Time Machines
A man and a woman both secretly make a time machine to go back and make sure they don’t break up.
They end up destroying the space time continuum.

`Chad

Friendship And Film

I love movies. I always have. When I was four years old I would watch and re-watch movies over and over. I could operate the VCR before I could read. A piece of tape marked the “play” button.

What movies would I watch over and over and over again? ET. Ghostbusters. Wizard Of Oz. Star Trek II. Goonies. Karate Kid I, II, III. Back To The Future I, II, III. What are these movies about? Friendship, really. Strong friendships. That’s what drew me to them. That’s what kept me coming back for more. That’s what kept me hitting rewind. (Remember ‘rewind’?) Sure, the spaceships, aliens, ghosts, gadgets, crazy-things, adventures, and special effects were neat, but the friendships kept me watching.

I wanted these friendships for myself. I wanted ET as my friend. I wanted Doc Brown as my friend. I wanted Spock as my friend. I wanted to have Mr. Miyagi as my friend. Or someone like them.

These were movies with small groups of protagonists or even just pairings. This worked great because I was an introvert. Why look for more friends? Who needs a crowd? You can’t fit 3 people into a Delorean, anyway.

Captain Kirk and Captain Spock, as far as I was concerned, were the archetype for what friendship could and should be between two men.

TWOK - Viacom/Paramount/CBS

Spock: Ship, out of danger?
Kirk: Yes.
Spock: Don’t grieve, Admiral, it is logical. The needs of many outweigh…
(voice breaking)
Kirk: …the needs of the few.
Spock: Or the one.
Spock: I never took the Kobayashi Maru test until now. What do you think of my solution?
(Spock almost-smiles, pleased with his almost-joke rhetorical question.)
Kirk: Spock…
(Kirk is surprised at his dying friend’s joke)
Spock: I have been, and always shall be, your friend.
Spock: Live long and prosper.

But of course Jim Kirk does find a way to cheat death, if only at a price, in the next movie.

Ambassador Sarek: Kirk, I thank you. What you have done is…
Kirk: What I have done, I had to do.
Ambassador Sarek: But at what cost? Your ship. Your son.
Kirk: If I hadn’t tried, the cost would have been my soul.

Later, Spock tries to understand why Kirk would come back for him.

TSFS - Viacom/Paramount/CBS

Spock: My father says that you have been my friend. You came back for me.
Kirk: You would have done the same for me.
(Spock is confused.)
Spock: Why would you do this?
Kirk: Because the needs of the one outweigh the needs of the many.
(Spock is slowly remembering Kirk, as if coming back from a far off place or waking from a dream)
Spock: “I have been and ever shall be your friend.”
Spock: “Ship, out of danger?”
Kirk: You saved the ship! You saved us all! Don’t you remember?
Spock: “Jim”. Your name is Jim.
Kirk: Yes.

In college I learned that Kirk and Spock “slash” fiction was a thing. Apparently it was easy (and popular) to see and read homoerotic subtext between the two characters. This was a surprise to me.

Post-college my best friend would be called my “Hetero-Life-Partner” /”Hetero-Life-Mate” / “Hetero-Man-Friend”.

There’s a funny story about that and it was also a surprise to me.
But that’s for another time.

`Chad